I will survive

God, plz help me survive.. i'm so full of hatred, jealousy, etc bad.. cant get a grip on my feeling.. whoosah whoosah... i hope i could really forget this, those people, those words, those memories and all the things that have hurt me so badly..

many people say 'if only i could bring back time, i would ... ... ...'

i really HATE that sentence. it's so cliche, so untrue, so... unfaithful... it's d second type of 'if clause' meaning: it will NEVER EVER come true!!! so i try my best NEVER to say those words as i want to live with no regrets, ever!! people who say that, in my eyes, they are cowards who cannot face the future, who are so desperate that they can never fix their mistakes and babblers who can only promise things but no action (i.e. NATO= no action talk only).

God, please forgive my sin for i really hate someone this much right now... i really couldnt help this feeling. i wanna shout it out loud so the world knows, but i know it'll be unwise.. i really need YOUR comforting love n forgiveness, so i can forgive others as You have forgiven me..

nevertheless, in the end i know I will survive, oh as long as i know how to love i know i'll be alive... i've got all my love to give, i've got all my life to live... i will survive yea yeah..... ahaha...

wew, i'm much happier person now. wkwkw... thx JC...

dear diary

Dear diary,

duhh bete bete bete ahh... bete bete ahh.. 

hixhixhixhhixxx

sedihsedihsedihsedih..

sebelsebelsebelsebel

pedihpedihpedihpedih

keselkeselkeselkesel

perihperihperihperih

kenyelkenyelkenyelkenyel (loh?!?)

yah intiny prasaan i skrg lg campur aduk, ngebala, seperti jg muka i yg ngebala dimana2 (kata nyokap -> baca: jerawatan dimana2. lolz) ga tau knp jg bs parah gini lagi ni muka.maybe stress. coz dulu jg stress so jrawatan.haha.... byuh... maybe once i find the cure for my stress then i'll automatically find the cure for my pimples, ain't i right, God?haha....

Home Alone 5-- released Oct 1 2008 ^^

huaa... baru aja 1mnit i saw my parents got into the taxi, headed for airport.hixhix... why suddenly i felt so sad?? i never even thought about it before. hixhix. tp krn loading my blogger lama so, kebuka blogger si keti duluan.haahha.. lmyn menghibur hati.h3

hmm...sebentar lagi i mo ada latian md lagi d greja. akhir2ni i ga sesemangat dulu lg latiannya. maybe coz ud mulai byk tugas di kul. blom lagi ni hari kan sbnrnya bukan jadwal latian tp disuru latian sementara gw ad hal penting laen yg ga bs ditunda (doa bareng2keluarga--cuman b3 si with mom n dad--sblm perjalanan panjang mereka ke amrik).

hyuhh... gni toh rasany home alone.dulu i sempet mikir, enak kali ya klo ke luar negri tinggal ndiri, jd bs mandiri jg. hyuhhh...yah gini deh rasanya. sedih deh. untung ada kiko. tengkyu kiko, u're my bestest-est-est fren ever!!!! even though u never wanna listen to me, not even bothered to pretend to listen to what i say. haha...

yah, scene 1 home alone 5 ud mo mulai nih. kali ni pemerannya bukan mcCauley Calkin lg. tp Lily n Kiko (n fish).huaha... scene 1 dmulai dgn adegan ortu naek taxi, nyokap ud mo mewek, anak jg ud hold on tight bgt bwt ga mewek.h3... trus bis tu si anak mewek bentar, doa, lgsg deh mencurahkan isi hati di blog.h3ga seru bgt sih ya filmnya... kyny ga sampe kelar ud di cut tuh film.h3



ukhs... i feel like praying before i go dancin'
"Tuhan, titip ortu aku yah. koko aku juga. smoga Tuhan kasi kendaraan terbaik (n supirnya), pesawat n pilot terbaik, cuaca yg baik jg, tour guide terbaik n segala kru2 lain yg terbaik yg ikut terlibat dlm tur mreka. brikan kesehatan, tubuh yg kuat, stamina yg fit, spya biarpun pjalananny melelahkan mereka bs enjoy every moment in the tour. selamatkan mereka smp bandara, ke amrik n muter2 di amrik, jg sampai mereka balik lg ke jakarta, ke rumah ini. jg klo beberapa hari sblm pulang mrk mo ketemu koko, Tuhan bantu luangkan waktu koko yg super sibuk spy bisa ketemu ortu n mereka bs enjoy their quality time together.

Tuhan juga sertai, jaga terus kami di indo, rumah n toko kami. tutup bungkus kami smua dgn kuasa darahMu, jauhkan dr marabahaya, kuasa jahat, orang2yg berniat jahat atas kami Kau tolak dr pada kami, ya Bapa. biarlah sgala sesuatunya bs berjalan lancar sesuai kehendakMu n kami boleh slalu bersyukur atas anugrah yg Kau kasi bwt kami. Jaga aku n kiko n sluruh isi rumah kami beserta toko kami jg spy kami terus Kau lindungi n terhindar dr sgala hal2yg buruk.

Ya Tuhan, kami mnyerahkan sluruh kehidupan kami hanya kpd Mu, Tuhan. hanya dlm nama Mu kami berdoa, Amen..."